Planet Minis

muxster

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These are actual comments made by 16 Police Officers.
The comments were taken off actual police car videos around the
country:

16. 'You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went
through.'

15. 'Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch
after you wear them a while.'

14. 'If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a
worthless document.'

13. 'If you run, you'll only go to jail tired.'

12. 'Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed
of the bullet that'll be
chasing you..'

11. 'You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write
anything I want to on the ticket, huh?'

10. 'Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it
will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift
supervisor?'

9. 'Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again
or I'll give you another ticket.. '

8. 'The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or
not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?'

7. 'Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to
ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and
step in monkey poop.'

6. 'Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster
oven.'

5. 'In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC.'

4. 'How big were those 'two beers' you say you had?'

3. 'No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed
to write as many tickets as we can.'

2. 'I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of
yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.'

AND THE WINNER IS....

1. 'You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't..
Sign here.'

jbirdklx110

Ha ha good times

I just graduated from the Police academy and one of my favorites from my head DI was this...

"Sign here please. Press hard your making three copies. Have a nice day."

Justin

firepower354

I was writing a ticket to a car parked across a sidewalk and sticking out in to the street, obstructing foot and motor traffic. A woman yelled from the house "Where are you and your G-D ticket book when the a**hole next door flies up and down the street". The WRONG answer, according to the Ombudsman complaint, was "Ma'am, I'm sorry, but I don't have time to write EVERY a**hole in the city a ticket". Maybe it was the timing of letting the wiper slap back to hold the ticket as I said it???

I worked 2nd shift, briefly, and parking was tight behind the PD, so I parked at the fire station next door. Got a parking ticket. Asked the shift Lt to void it. He stated "No one's above the law". I drove the cruiser a couple of blocks to downtown, found the Downtown Development Authority "Security" car parked at an expired meter and issued it a parking ticket. The chief's son was the DDA officer... Was advised by radio to meet same shift Lt in his office shortly after. He could barely keep a straight face when I said "No one's above the law, right?".

__________________
If it has my name on it I did it;)

FirepowerMinis.com
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BigUncleT

^ You're my favorite kind of ball breaker! - a SMART one!

Wraith

I just graduated from the Police academy . . . . .



Sorry to hear that!!!!!!

firepower354

My favorite bit of advice was "If somebody's pointing a gun at you, remember the "Three F's". "Fire 'till the Fellow Falls". But nobody, even the late Sgt. R.Dunning uses "fellow"...

__________________
If it has my name on it I did it;)

FirepowerMinis.com
Custom FPM parts and engines.
Parts and service for all makes.
Honda Trail Bikes parts and accessories.
Pitster/Piranha/Thumpstar bikes, parts, engines and accessories.

DGAF MATTY 420

i dont know if i could hold a straight face if some of those were said to me..officers dont like when you laugh either from my experiences

Motokids

We just had a cop shoot/kill a guy in our parking lot at work 2 days ago (10 feet in front of my truck). "Get out of the car Mother Fu$%er, bap-bap-bap-bap"! Apparently this guy was a bad man, and this incident started about 10 miles from my parking lot, but ended there!

kawasakicoby125

my brother used this one, i think it was from a tv show, " im sorry officer..... i didnt know i couldnt do that" hahaha

Booty Freak

Last week I had the pitbike out riding & didn't know I had two county
sheriffs following me down a dirt road into the woods until I hear the
sirens go off. Shut off the bike turned around one sheriff says,

"Sorry, thought you were a kid. Next time stay off the roads."

FIVEO

My problem is I'm a wise ass right back at them . Been wrote up several times for it due to we have digital vid and audio.. Can really say it didn't happen that way...I thimk what I should do is keep a log of all the stupid stuff people say as an excuse.. The best one lataly was I observed a car driving the wrong way on a one way street. When i pulled her over she stated she was in a rush to get to her friends house that was just rapped by her dad... I said WHAT............... Lets go i'll see whats going on and help you... She then said don't worry about it, it's no nig deal...............Funny Sh?t